Saturday, May 26, 2007

Not Alone

I am convinced that I am not alone. I feel some measure of certainty that you too have isolated moments of recollection brought on by the appearance of a familiar face. It seems somehow not out of the ordinary for me to experience renewed emotion when I uncover an old greeting card saved for its particular place in the annals of my life’s passage. Perhaps you have some set-aside memorabilia that you can just see or touch to unleash anew that still-fresh awareness of something worthy of cherishing.

But we… you and I… seldom speak of these things. Hence, we have no easy, comfortable, and usual vocabulary for inclusion of these aspects of ourselves in our present living. I am writing today to (in some small measure) remedy that oversight. For, My Dear Friend, I am presently living in the midst of a very real and tangible awareness of all of the sensations appreciated in a romance and passion of many years ago. I do not know Life's purpose in today's delightful gift. But, Dear Friend, I can candidly tell you that it is a wonderful experience. So, I share it with you.

It began with an image seen as a “thumb-nail” photo on the periphery of a page on an online dating site. The eyes were Her’s. The shape and proportion of features of the face were Her’s. The over-all effect of facial expression was just as familiar as yesterday, though it has been well over seventeen years since we last saw each other. This person's stated location was within a few miles of where I addressed the last letter that I posted to Her.

I was overwhelmed with emotion! At a complete loss as to how to react, I sent an absurdly obtuse message to the person on the Site… which she deleted, after reading. I find myself, still today, not knowing how to respond to the surge of powers loosened by this glimpse of an anonymous “Someone” who has awakened all of the circuitry of energies generated by the very thought of Her.


Then, as I opened the small archive of saved mementoes and correspondences, I uncovered the greeting card with the “Happy Anniversary” message (the image created by Renoir that accompanies this message is the image on that card.) And, again, the intensity of my feelings is heightened with Her words spoken on that card back in 1989. And I am further aware that, as of April 8 of 2008, it will be twenty years since we first met… And I am as much in love with her at this very moment as I was then or at any point after then.

It is a comfortable, Peaceful, Undemanding, Non-threatening, Accepting, Forgiving, Funny, Silly, Giddy, Deep, Profound, and Gentle Love. It requires nothing other than itself. It is complete in every way. It could in no way be improved upon (though Her presence would be a wonderful enhancement!) And I am abundantly grateful for this Love’s place in the totality of my Being.

All of the aforesaid ideas, thoughts, and impressions were visited upon me during the pre-dawn hours of this morning that found me making my newspaper deliveries. And… yes… I did have a moment of self-doubt as to the wisdom, maturity, prudence, and rational rightness of such thinking. And right on cue! At that very moment… Life responded with a beautiful and timely reply in the form of the playing of one of Our favorite and most poignant songs… played on the one still-functioning speaker of my van’s radio. I listened, sang, smiled, and celebrated it as it played… then turned the radio off lest the spell be broken. I share with you now (for your very own revisiting of your treasured moments and memories), the words to “Endless Love.”

Endless Love - Lionel Richie and Diana Ross

My Love… there's only you in my life…
The only thing that's right.

My First Love… you're every breath that I take…
You're every step I make.

And I… I want to share all my love with you…
No one else will do.

And your eyes… they tell me how much you care…
Oh, yes… you will always be… My Endless Love.

Two hearts… two hearts that beat as one…
Our lives have just begun.

Forever… I'll hold you close in my arms…
I can't resist your charms.

And love… I'll be a fool for you, I'm sure…
You know I don't mind.

'Cause you… you mean the world to me…
Oh, I… know I found… in you… My Endless Love.

And love… I'll be that fool for you…
I'm sure you know I don't mind.

And yes… you'll be the only one…
'Cause no one can deny…This love I have inside…
And I'll give it all to you… my love… My Endless Love.

1 comment:

ejluvtolaugh said...

Ooooh, and that is when love hurts...when it is not returned yet you still go on loving endlessly. Yet we are healed by all the natural love we have to share with life itself.

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