Breakfast

Mom and I shared a Pizza, last Saturday night, as we enjoyed the Winter Olympics together. She lives less than 10 minutes from Dav and Heather's home in Land-O-Lakes (14 miles North of my cottage.) Thanks to the lovely generosity of D&H, I have the use of their sweet little Honda Civic whilst I am Home/Pet sitting for them. Hence the nightly visits with Mom over the past 4 nights.

"So," you may ask, "what has any of this to do with 'Breakfast'?" Well, my Dear Friend, here 'tis. Let your mind conjure an image of a skillet warming on the stove at 'medium-high' heat ... a nice splash of extra-virgin olive oil and a pat of unsalted butter getting to know each other, on an intimate basis, therein ... the toppings (Italian sausage, pepperoni, onion, mushroom, tomato sauce, cheeses, and peppers) from a slice of the aforementioned pizza scraped from their pizza crust ... into the now-sizzling pan ... and 2 lovely eggs broken over the entirety.

All, of this, heating, blending, and emitting aromas that would enchant the Angels on high ... whilst the eggs cook to a nice soft-scramble. Then, from the toaster-oven, the now-crispy pizza crust is placed on a plate and has its topping-companions reintroduced to it. Taa-Daa! Breakfast. [happy grin]

PS: How is this for a View? (from D&H's back yard ... over which I look as I enjoy Breakfast on the patio shown in earlier photos.) Ahhhh!



I bid You, My Darling Reader, the very best of days ('cause I am thinking about how much I love You ... Yes I Am!)

A Place for Our Mind to Dwell

I had a lengthy chat with One who is very dear and precious to me. This lovely Being was vexed by a 'Friend's insistence on constantly bringing up names and incidents that have hurtful and unhappy histories attached to them.

How do I explain to this darling One the fact that ...
Some choose to dwell ...

... when, with the same effort, they could be ...

They elect ...

over ...

Yes! I know. It seems incomprehensible (at best)
that with ...

served up and ready ...

There are folks who prefer to focus on ...

As you can guess, I will be addressing this topic
(at some greater length)
in a Post, to follow.

[smiling]

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!

by Michael Fry and T Lewis

(Please CLICK On The Cartoon for FULL SIZE)

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!

Under the "Take a Moment Tree"

Today, I am drawn to the subject, yet again. So, come … please join me, here, under the “Take a Moment Tree” … and I will share with You, Dear Reader, what this matter of “Accountability” means to me.

I am accountable to Life for the answer to THE big question ... namely, “How good a job did you do, and/or are you doing, at BEing John-Michael?" Not, “What titles did you hold?” nor "What roles did you play?” nor "What offices did you fill?" No question of "How much?" of anything, will determine the success of my short while on this earth. Just "How did you respond to, and use, that unique Treasure (including its particular set of gifts) that is the individual Design, by which you were lovingly created?”

That is the scale upon which I am weighed, day by day, and through eternity. So I am compelled to respond, without reservation, to each opportunity served to me each day in the knowledge that all things are under the control of the Creator of it all. And each, of those opportunities, has a purpose. I do not want to disappoint my Self ... deprive that Person... or lessen the value of that experience, by withholding any part of Me, from each moment.

For example, there was the occasion when I pulled over to the curb and exchanged salutations with the lady who was walking her dog in the early-morning, before-preparation-for-work, pre-dawn stillness. (This is the time that folks are accustomed to seeing the newspaper delivery guy [me] who had [at the time of this happening] been there every day for the prior fifteen years.) We shared comments about now-forgotten things, and then (in response to the urging of my "Still, Small, Inner Voice") I said something like "Please forgive my intrusion, but I detect, in your tone, an obvious lack of enthusiasm for the job that you plan to engage yourself in today."

This is the moment when Life rewards my courage with an affirmation that I have ventured onto "prepared soil". The lady began to unreservedly reveal her unhappiness with both of the jobs that she felt herself trapped into. Like so many today, her economic requirements necessitated her working more than one job and, like many, if not most, she found no satisfaction in either of hers.

I then revealed to her the possibilities available through career counseling and gave her some examples of successes that I have known personally. I explained the functions of some of the testing tools available, to assist in evaluating one’s preferences, proclivities, talents, and individually innate inclinations … and illustrated the ways in which the test results can be translated into a satisfying and even enjoyable career.

Some months later, in response to my passing wave, she stopped me and told me that she had decided to follow through on researching options for herself. Still many months later, I saw a "U-Haul" trailer in the street with several people engaged in the never-enviable task of moving-day labor. To my surprise, the lady flagged me down (I didn’t even know that she lived there) and announced "I took your advice. As a result of the testing and counseling that I pursued, I am (as you can plainly see) moving to a new location to begin a new career that is the fulfillment of my dreams. Thank you for your advice. You gave me encouragement, hope, and a plan"

I went my way and she hers without even knowing each other's names. All that matters is that I gave Life an opportunity to let that young lady know that there was a waiting and ready potential for something special for her life. And all that was required of me was the willingness to allow Life to use the experience and knowledge acquired over my personal life-walk, and offer it to this person who was both ready for it, and receptive to it. Her life was transformed ... and I am forever blessed.

So, you see, My Dear Friend, willingness, availability, and receptiveness are the only requirements for us to be of immediate and tangible service to that world that is all around each of us ... moment by moment, through each day that is given to us. And in participating in these opportunities, we can make our world a bit better ... person by person ... experience by experience ... you and I … living in loving sensitivity, to our own personal world, can change life for the better.

I invite you to be bold, open, and alive in the moments of your life. And, as we look into each of our personal, intimate, and private "mirrors" of reflection, we can know that we have responded appropriately to those gifts presented to us by Life. In those fleeting opportunities that were given to us ... that we responded to Life’s summons to Be that unique individual that was needed in that fleeting moment. And that we embraced our personal calling for or own Accountability ... to ourselves ... to that other Soul ... and to Life.

Please trust me ... it’s great fun!


IMAGE: Through the gracious courtesy of Ian Britton, FreeFoto.com

A Moment of 'Illumination' ... on Significance

As I observed the husband, who had allowed himself to become completely unattractive (through obvious absence of personal care), focusing, with intense care, on the removal of a minuscule spot of dirt from his shiny new ‘four-by-four,’ deluxe edition, pickup truck … as his wife totally ignored him to the same degree that he was oblivious to her … the thought came to me …
“When we become Insignificant to our ‘Significant Other,’ it is altogether likely that we will shift focus away from him/her ...To some-One, or some-Thing, in whom, or in which, we will find some measure of compensating Validation to satisfy our innately human need for significance.”
Which raised, for me, the personal question: “When did you shift your focus to Friends, hobby, Lovers, and/or business, social, or religious Activities, as your Source, for validation of your individual significance?” And the flood of memories began.





IMAGE: Through the gracious courtesy of Jon Sullivan, PDPhoto.org

Aristotle (pretty smart guy) on FRIENDSHIP

The ancients listed friendship among the highest of virtues. It was an essential element in the fully flourishing life. “For without friends,” Aristotle says, “no one would choose to live, though he had all other goods.” Words worth remembering in a world of perishable “goods.”

According to Aristotle, friendship either is, or it involves, a state of Character, a Virtue. There are three kinds of friendship. These are based on pleasure in another’s company (friendships of Pleasure), or on usefulness in association (friendships of Utility), or on mutual admiration (friendships in Virtue). All are essential to the good life, and the best sorts of friends will not only admire each other’s excellence but take pleasure in each other’s company and find their association to be of mutual advantage. Here is a portion of Aristotle’s classic discussion.

From: The Nicomachean Ethics

"As the motives to friendship differ in kind, so do the respective feelings and Friendships. The species then of Friendship are three, in number equal to the objects of it, since in the line of each there may be “mutual affection ... mutually known.”

Now they who have Friendship for one another desire one another’s Good according to the motive of their Friendship; accordingly, they whose motive is Utility have no Friendship for one another really, but only insofar as some good arises to them from one another.

And they whose motive is Pleasure are in like case: I mean, they have Friendship for men of easy pleasantry, not because they are of a given character but because they are pleasant to themselves. So then, they whose motive to Friendship is Utility love their friends for what is good to themselves; they whose motive is Pleasure do so for what is pleasurable to themselves; that is to say, not insofar as the friend beloved is but insofar as he is useful or pleasurable. These Friendships are a matter of result; since the object is not beloved in that he is the man he is, but in that he furnishes advantage or pleasure, as the case may be.

Such Friendships are, of course, very liable to dissolution if the parties do not continue alike: I mean, that the others cease to have any Friendship for them when they are no longer pleasurable or useful. Now it is the nature of both pleasure and utility not to be permanent, but constantly varying: so, of course, when the motive which made them friends is vanished, the Friendship likewise dissolves; since it existed only relatively to those circumstances…

That then is perfect Friendship which subsists between those who are good and whose similarity consists in their goodness: for these wish one another’s good in similar ways; insofar as they are good (and good they are in themselves); and those are specially friends who wish good to their friends for their sakes, because they feel thus toward them on their own account and not as a mere matter of result; so the Friendship between these men continues to subsist so long as they are good; and goodness, we know, has a principle of permanence….

Rare it is probable Friendships of this kind will be, because men of this kind are rare. ... [ Note: With regard to the matter of 'rarity', it is worthy to note that, given the definitions of values inherent to Temperaments and Personality Styles (as identified by the “Myers/Briggs” methodology) those individuals given to the “Utility” and “Pleasure” motivations, as their most NATURAL and easily followed inclinations, make up approximately 85% of the general population. For these (the vast majority of the population) to seek the "Good" motivation requires some determined effort of Will.] ... Besides, all requisite qualifications being presupposed, there is further required time and intimacy: for, as the proverb says, men cannot know one another “till they have eaten the requisite quantity of salt together”; nor can they, in fact, admit one another to intimacy (much less be friends) till each has appeared to the other and been proved to be a fit object of Friendship. They who speedily commence an interchange of friendly actions may be said to wish to be friends, but they are not so unless they are also proper objects of Friendship and mutually known to be such: that is to say … a desire for Friendship may arise quickly but not Friendship itself."

_______________________________________

With the insights stated by Aristotle and restated countless times since then by innumerable others in various forms ... it should be clear to all that we do not all share the same hopes for, nor desires in, our friends. It is, then, my humble opinion that it might suite us better (and be far more fun), if we could celebrate the rare gifts in Friends that Life has given us; exercise the particular senses of 'taste' that satisfy our requirements for new friends; and avoid the easily available habit of condemning others for not living up to our unique set of expectations and/or qualifications for our "Friends."

I found ... in my personal quest to find a means for understanding (and accepting) the vagaries of those supposing to, at one moment, present themselves as Friend ... then assume themselves to be but passing Acquaintances ... that Dear Aristotle's observations were of great help. I offer them to You, Dear Reader and Friend, in the hope that your happiness and comfort will be similarly served.

Acceptance ... Respect ... Honor ... and Appreciation of each other - as we are - makes for a delightful world in which to celebrate the wonder of who we are. Just a thought ... [smile]


This item submitted with credit and thanks to the work of William J. Bennet in his "Virtues of Friendship and Loyalty." (A wonderful idea for a gift)

"We Need To Talk !" (please)

It is in the moment created by some extraordinary circumstance that we are presented with the opportunity to make dramatic change in our lives. I have been blessed with a few such opportunities.

“Where are their fathers?” I asked of the director of the United Cerebral Palsy Center as we discussed the challenges faced by the small children being cared for in his facility. “Oh, they frequently say that they ‘just can’t deal with the situation’ and leave“ he replied. I learned, then, that not everyone commits to change when immovable or uncompromisable circumstances present themselves. Some choose to simply ‘run for the hills.’

I know well the grip of fear when life declares, through that aforementioned 'uncompromisable circumstance,' How unwelcome that "WE NEED TO TALK!" moment is. The “need to talk” imperative is never a pleasant one ... whether presented by our unavoidable inner voice (our conscience, or soul-voice) or the challenging voice of another. The message is always the same “you must consider something different and/or acknowledge present insufficiencies.” And none of us eagerly embrace either an insufficiency or a change. (It has been well said by some ancient sage, “It is easier for man to accept the miseries of a poor life than for him to confront the fears inherent to change.” And I can affirm that truth from my own struggling experience.)

Hence I am writing to let you know that the beginning point for my venture, into all of my Tomorrows ... was to take an isolated moment with myself and say, “WE NEED TO TALK.” (I then refused the natural survival impulse to' run for the hills.')

I found that talking with one’s inner self requires both asking and listening (with patience) for answers. “As a man thinketh … so is he.” came to my awareness. Please make note here … it is not what he thinks, not a matter of quantity of data considered … but HOW he thinks … with what motivating qualities. That is, in other terms, “where my thinking was coming from” or what my motivations were. We are not talking about “goals” or “dreams” here, but instead, the “music” driving the “lyrics” of our thoughts ... the “core” of us. I had to decide on an overarching Theme for my thinking.

If our intentions are self-serving then they must be acknowledged to be just exactly that without the prejudice of any possible outside perspectives. If the mind-set of “I am looking out for what will serve my best interests” is what you choose to drive your voice, then have the courage to say so to yourself and to the world around you. This “sit-down” is just with yourself and no outside valuation is appropriate. If your intentions are ridiculously altruistic, then that should be the set foundation for a confidence in the thinking’s value and worth. Remember … As you think, so you are. It is in this mode that you will find yourself thinking things that, heretofore, you have never thought (perhaps for fear of judgment, mockery, or rejection.) In my case, I became aware of a voice that was not familiar … a spiritual (though, most definitely, not “religious”) voice that expressed thoughts beyond those to which I was accustomed.

I found comfort in the knowledge that all of the world’s cultures have been aware, from earliest time, of an influence that shades our thinking. We have identified this influence as “higher” or “lower”, as light/dark, evil/good, positive/negative, yen/yang, etc… How often have we heard the well worn “you see the glass half-empty/half’-full” label for our thinking or predisposition? Such is the “music” to which I refer when I make mention of the foundation of all of our thinking. This is, most definitely, NOT a matter of attitude or whimsical mood. This is the “Spiritual bent” that would guide my thought processes. The sort of identity that enables people to make statements like, “He seems to see the potential for good in every situation.” That kind of Spirit versus the “You can be sure that he will find something to complain about.” mode. The “Well, you may not know what his decision will be, but you can be sure that it will be based on ____" (and you can fill in the blank with the character trait that is certain to drive that choice to be made by him.)

Herein lies the “As he thinks” mechanism. There is NOTHING else, in this life, that is in our complete control. In this and only this can we exercise complete sway … the spirit to which we trust all of the processing of our thought. We actively choose the “As” of our thinking. Our basic ability to think may be impaired or even enhanced by Life’s touch, but regardless of our capacity for mental function, we all (with some clinical exceptions) maintain moment-by-moment control of our willingness to surrender our thoughts to a greater or lesser, bitter or better, higher or lower Influence. This is the ultimate power of our will. So, my Dear, Patient Reader, it became clear to me that I had to elect the Master Control for all the choices, measures, and elections that I suspected lay ahead for me and those who would be affected by those calculations. (And I knew, with absolute certainty, that much of what I chose would not find ready favor, or reception, with many in my world.)

I recall an old story that illustrates this principal to my satisfaction. It seems that an old man was visiting with his guru for the purpose of learning, further, how to discipline his thinking. “It is like there are two dogs fighting over control of my mind” the old man offered, “the dog of anger pulls one way while the dog of peace pulls the other.” “And which dog wins the battle?” asked the guru. “The one that I say ‘sic-em’ to” answered the man. You do, of course, see my point. The “dogs” of influence and guiding perspective will ALWAYS be there, vying for dominance over the “musical soundtrack” accompanying our thought processes. The choice of music is constantly in our control… soothing/clashing, harmonious/discordant, uplifting/downgrading, … etc., etc. We, though, have the one and only deciding vote to determine which voice is told to “sic”, or take dominance over, the other.

I hope, in this reflection, to encourage not only your own confidence in, and willingness to be at peace with, your individual option for your thinking processes ... but also to heartily encourage you to be carefully discriminating about those who you surround yourself with. Life can be far more enjoyable if we will exercise considerate care in the creating of beneficial settings for comfortable and mutually respectful exchanges of insights. Settings that will serve as a stage for a harmonious intercourse as opposed to an arena or field of battle ... first within ourselves, and then with the world around us. It is critical to recognize the kind of “music” accompanying the messages offered by those with whom we hope to achieve a harmonious exchange. Which dog is in control of each of your spirits?

Can you imagine anything more pleasant than two people meeting with a spirit of generosity (for example) motivating both of them? “I want to be more generous than you.” “No, no, please allow me to be more generous than you.” The possibilities boggle the mind. But reality is, alas, most often, quite different.

The point of beginning is, however, the same for us all … LISTENING to the “music“ of our own spiritual soundtrack. And then deciding … actively and responsibly … how we want to “orchestrate “ all of our thinking ... for all of our tomorrows.

Now ... some two-score years removed from those earliest confrontations with those irksome "We need to talk!" moments ... I can tell you that through all of the darkest of moments; the most vexing of conflicts; painful misunderstandings; heart-breaking losses; and debilitating anxieties ... because I did, indeed, make those specific and precise choices as to the set of my Spirit's sail ... it is well with my Soul! And that, My Darling Friend, makes for a peaceful smile in the quiet of my Todays.




IMAGES through the gracious courtesy of Jon Sullivan, PDPhoto.org

Romantic Lunch ... Sidewalk Cafe'

“If you could wave a magic wand toward here, in Ontario, from there, in Florida, and grant my fondest wish … I would wish for a romantic lunch at a sidewalk café … with You.”

These were her words to me over the telephone. We knew each other in only a strict business relationship. We had met in person on the one occasion that brought her, and her husband, to my city on holiday. They had come by my office in response to my offer of hospitality when she told me (in the course of our routine business transactions over the phone) that they would be in our area for their vacation.

I was so smitten with her grace and beauty that I locked an ironclad focus on her husband during the entirety of their visit. I knew that my overwhelming attraction to her would be unavoidably obvious to him if I allowed even the briefest of glances in her direction. The thirty minutes of their stay was excruciating. Upon her return to her post as a contact person between my office and the Head Office of our employing company, no mention was ever made of her visit.

Then, after the passing of several weeks with no reason for contact, I phoned the Head Office, in Ontario, to resolve a technical problem. I did not notice, when I placed the call, that it was the noon-hour, when the majority of staff could be expected to be taking their lunch break. After she answered her phone I apologized for the inconsiderate timing of my call, and offered to call back at a more convenient time. Whereupon she insisted that I stay on the line with the statement “No … please continue with this call. I haven’t any special plans for lunch today.” My response (hoping to demonstrate my appreciation for the generosity of her personal time given) was “If it were in my power, and if I had a magic wand with which to accomplish it, what special ‘lunch-wish’ could I grant you?” Then came her aforementioned reply.

I telephoned her later that afternoon (after scooping the scattered elements of my emotions into some semblance of order) and said “Please know that I live my life with the major part of me sealed in a vacuum. This is how I survive daily life. I must ask that you not toy with the seal on that vacuum, lest you be pulled into something that is far more powerful than anything that you might want to deal with.” This was the first time in my life that I had ever attempted verbalizing something that I was acutely aware of but had no definition for. She then indicated her desire to remove the ‘seal.’

Herein lies the importance of this story for you, Dear Reader. You, I, we all have unexpressed; yet vividly real feelings and convictions lying deep within the core of ourselves. These are far too frequently pushed aside, discounted, ignored, and even rejected outright because we haven't a comfortable or serviceable forum for the healthy consideration and honoring of them. I had not been introduced to the understandings available through “temperament” or “personality styles.” I had yet to be introduced to myself by the words of David Keirsey in his Please Understand Me II;

“Idealists are looking for more than life partners in their mates … they want soul partners, persons with whom they can bond in some special spiritual sense, sharing their complex inner lives and communicating intimately about what most concerns them: their feelings and their causes, their romantic fantasies and their ethical dilemmas, their inner division and their search for wholeness.”

And here I was, for the first time in my life, verbalizing (in the wholly inadequate, yet only terms at my disposal) the most powerful Force at the most central part of me. And I knew that the person who brought this recognition to the surface of my awareness was the single person in my world with whom I could be totally honest and unabashedly candid in the exposure of this aspect of Me. What a moment!


Note: This is an abbreviated excerpt from Chapter 5 of a book in progress.

A "Feel Good" Place

I was very pleased when a friend told me that visiting my blog made him feel good. Nothing could possibly be more to my liking nor give me more satisfaction than providing a place where both Friends and passing Strangers can have a moment of comfortable ‘feeling good.’

Reflecting on that truth, I am reminded of a most treasured poem. It was written by Sam Walter Foss (1858-1911) and is titled The House by the Side of the Road. I share it with you in the hope that it gives you, in the midst of whatever daily madness you are dealing with, a moment of feeling good. And I thank you for your visit.

The House by the Side of the Road

“He was a friend to man,
and he lived in a house by the side of the road.”
Homer

There are hermit souls that live withdrawn
In their place of self-content;
There are souls like stars, that dwell apart,
In a fellowless firmament;
There are pioneer souls that blaze their paths
Where highways never ran-
But let me live by the side of the road
And be a friend to man.

Let me live in a house by the side of the road,
Where the race of men go by-
The men who are good and the men who are bad,
As good and as bad as I.
I would not sit in the scorner’s seat,
Or hurl the cynic’s ban-
Let me live in a house by the side of the road
And be a friend to man.

I see from my house by the side of the road,
By the side of the highway of life,
The men who press with the ardor of hope,
The men who are faint with the strife.
But I turn not away from their smiles nor their tears,
Both parts of an infinite plan-
Let me live in a house by the side of the road
And be a friend to man.

I know there are brook-gladdened meadows ahead
And mountains of wearisome height;
That the road passes on through the long afternoon
And stretches away to the night.
But still I rejoice when the travelers rejoice,
And weep with the strangers that moan,
Nor live in my house by the side of the road
Like a man who dwells alone.

Let me live in my house by the side of the road-
It’s here the race of men go by.
They are good, they are bad, they are weak, they are strong,
Wise, foolish - so am I;
Then why should I sit in the scorner’s seat,
Or hurl the cynic’s ban?
Let me live in my house by the side of the road
And be a friend to man.

Over the Hedge (with purpose)

by Michael Fry and T Lewis






Now ... perhaps you're ready for the Post below ...

[grin]

Move Your Money

In the midst of all of our hand-wringing frustration, and well-earned anger ...

there is THIS ...



... which I think is pretty cool!

(PS: To help clear the Fog of "What in the world is going on with the Banking Industry?!" ... I recommend this ... http://www.pbs.org/moyers/journal/01082010/watch.html%20/ ... BILL Moyers JOURNAL Interview. [copy and paste the address] I found it very helpful and informative.)

Building Project

My, oh my! How discouraged I have, so often, been. My past was colored by the belief that every element of my life was to be held up to a Final Inspection … the ultimate examination that determines the acceptability of a finished structure. With each disappointing incident along my life’s path, I felt myself (afresh and anew) a Failure. I labored under the misconception that each step along the way was a decisive and final one. I now know better.

What I now understand is that this whole deal is a construction project. Yep! I was, and continue to be, under construction. What I did not see was the purpose and intent of the Great Architect in my life. Happily, I now get it. I see all of that yucky and unfulfilling work, that was so exhausting and unglamorous, as the necessary clearing away, of all that would impair the ultimate enterprise … the building of the ‘Who’ that I am (someday) to be. (A lot of “site preparation” was required in my life. Much removal of faulty ideas, tainted mindsets, prejudices, and biases cluttered the environment of my “job site.” A lot of rubble and unstable substrata needed removal.) This was played out in a host of frustrating and painful experiences and choices that seemed (at the time) to spell “More Failures.” (These are the times when the world around us may think that we are wasting our time or our talents. They see no impressive outer evidence of anything laudable in our lives … for “site work” is neither glamorous nor entertaining to those looking from the outside.)

With each confrontation with conflict or change, I felt that I had, once again, fallen short of some mysterious Standard. (A religious fundamentalist upbringing contributed greatly to this mindset.) Instead of the refining of myself that I now know was taking place … I saw my walk through life as stumbling and disjointed. Relationships, jobs, and associations seemed to lay haphazardly strewn in my life’s wake. Now I know that each was necessary for the construction of a Foundation upon which I could become who I was designed to be.

I could have built my life as a Lean-To that would provide rudimentary shelter. I had plenty of encouragement to settle for that. “Know your place, and stay in it!” was the constant message from all of the ‘Significants’ of my world. But the Grand Architect of life obviously had other plans for me. And it is definitely so for each of us … you included, my Dear Friend!
So, I ask that you consider, with me, the reality that is our shared life experience. I ask that you allow a new perception of what is going on in your life, as a necessary (and useful) stage or step in the building of a finer and more fulfilled You. Where you see yet another instance of something incomplete, consider that it might be the digging through, and removal of the unsteady ground of unstable thinking or fears … in order to pour a solid foundation of reliable certainty, and resolute determination.

When the ‘walls’ of your life’s structure seem to be so slow in taking shape today … couldn’t it be that Life is guiding you in carefully setting in place a ‘cornerstone’ that will determine the true and certain reference point for sound and reliable choices in your tomorrows? I encourage you to permit patience in this critical step in your life-work. It will make for many happy moments of satisfied reflection as you watch, with confidence, your life’s ‘structure’ take shape. Please be patient with yourself … and Life.

I relish the idea that I may never complete the finishing touches on this building enterprise. For I can reflect on those marvelous cathedrals that inspire and give comfort to all who either stand at a distance and allow the wonder of them to touch their Spirit … or, upon entering, embrace whatever elements of these grand edifices they find speaking to their core. These cathedrals have been built, not by one generation of builders and craftsmen … but by many, who added their contributions to what they had been inspired by and drawn to. It is my hope to have contributed to the site work, foundation preparation, and perhaps even cornerstone laying and wall beginning, that will give inspiration and enthusiasm to succeeding Souls who will enjoy adding their own skills and talents toward the building of a world that will promote loving acceptance of others; caring service to our community; gentle support of neighbors; and a place of respite for those who are weary and worn by life’s storms and trials. Whatever I can add to that Cathedral is a good thing!

This is the cathedral that I give myself to building. This is the blueprint that I have envisioned and given myself to. In this understanding, I can accept all of the ‘site work’ that is my past. I embrace all of those pesky changes and alterations that I had to make to what I had heard others tell me was what I should be … or ought to be doing. (It is now clear that there are all too many “sidewalk superintendants” who are willing and anxious to voice their opinions, as to what they see as the ‘proper’ edifice, that our lives should take shape as.) Happily, I trust the Eternal Architect of life, and rest in the vision that I am given for today’s efforts. I know that the application of my best efforts, in each of my “Todays,” will, ultimately, result in something worthy. This frees me of concern for whatever the “finished product” will be. Giving my best to what is at hand is my immediate responsibility.

I am completely content with allowing Life to take care of whatever the future might be. Not my job! Had I leaned on my past understandings, I would have settled for some lesser structure that would have disappointed and failed to provide comfort for my Spirit. I am now enjoying my daily installments toward something that I am certain will be far better than I could have ever imagined. (For I celebrate my present state of Being as exponentially better than I had ever hoped for.)

I know that all of this may sound at least a bit ‘spatial’ and abstract. But I ask that you permit my thoughts a place in the quiet of your consideration … that your own Inner Voice might whisper whatever Truth or Encouragement that may germinate from my whimsy.

Ultimately, I do think that we can, together, find some measure of comfort in considering this Moment as an acceptable, and even satisfying, step in the direction of our meaningfully enjoyable lifetime. I know that your love and encouraging support have made the structure of my Being much more sound and comfortable. And I thank you for your kind and generous contribution. I bid you “Good building!”

[loving smile]

We Cavorted

“Cavorting!” … This is the word that proclaimed itself to my mind in the instant of my awakening. That is what Dad and I had just been doing. Then I awoke … and had the immediate realization ... “Dad is gone!” (for this is, in truth, the sad fact.) Yet I was stilled for a moment by the suddenness of my recollection. What I had just been enjoying was a memory of something that had never been a common reality for Dad and me … “cavorting together” (though he and I had a long-running, tacit understanding that we would have loved to.)

The closest that we ever came was on that Thanksgiving Day, some years ago, when I showed up, at the home that he and Mom shared, with the promised Thanksgiving feast purchased from a restaurant. All of the side dishes were prepared and ready. All that was required (as I now recall) was the baking of the turkey, made ready, by the restaurant, in a pan.

Given the fact that a span of a few hours was needed for the roasting of “the bird”, Dad and I obtained the reluctant approval, from Mom (who did not like the idea of joining us, in our excursion, "just for the fun of it") for the two of us to set out on an exploratory drive ... in my new Jeep Cherokee.

So … off we went. And I do not remember having ever seen Dad letting himself enjoy such a child-like delight in an adventure. Lighthearted laughter and freedom of spirit were our comfortable companions. Me and my Dad. My Daddy and I. Us! Father and Son. It was glorious!

We drove to a spot that had a view over the Bay to the flashing light of, what remains of, the Egmont Key Lighthouse, where his Dad (my Grandfather), had served as Assistant Lighthouse Keeper, in Dad’s youth. We read the inscription on the memorial to the sailors lost in the sinking of a Coast Guard ship … whilst savoring the distinct aromas of the head-waters of the Bay.

We treated ourselves to some silly snacks from vending machines (something that Dad had always considered an expense far beyond rational reason.) I showed him new avenues of travel made possible by the construction of bridges and roadways that he had no idea existed. And we arrived back home later than Mom had allowed was considerate of her.

As I spoke with Dad through the open window of the Jeep, upon taking my leave, and subsequent to a very miserable evening, of strained submission, to an air of guilt and reproof, Dad said only “I’ll never do that again!” Which proved (unfortunately) to be quite prophetic, on his part.

But we did, just that once, cavort! And it was enough for me to have a recollection, upon my awakening, of how wonderful it was.

I miss you Dad. (And I miss all of the cavorting that we would have loved to have done ... but never did.)

[Definition: “Cavort”/ To act or behave in a jovial and exuberant fashion. ]

How Real?

There is always the remote chance that someone reading my thoughts, or engaging me in a bit of a chat, focused on our responsibility to the Moment, will question "How Real" my actual practice of what I profess, might be.

I am sharing today's living demonstration of just such a happening. (Mind you ... I would never offer my personal response as any sort of 'standard' ... only my own individual choice of "Muse satisfaction." [smile])

'Twas upon seeing a very familiar name on a list of fellow graduates from my high School. Good ol' reliable Muse whispered her conspiratorial "Lest she never know!" And I clicked on the "Send Email" icon.

The message speaks for itself ...

Hi [name withheld],

It has taken these many years ... and Life 'nudging' me through Mom's reminding me of the instance (she was always very fond of you,[and knows how much I cared about you]) ... for me to muster the courage to confess what caused me to allow our budding relationship to wither.

Please know that I was totally enchanted with you. And on that night (that you have probably completely forgotten by now) when I was taking you home in our family car, I stopped and told you hurriedly that I had to "check on the strange noise coming from the rear of the car." What I did not then ... and it has taken 'til now to ... have the courage to tell you, was that I had an undiagnosed problem with my bladder. I, in fact, had to frantically get out of the car and hide behind the open trunk, to deal with the fact that my bladder had failed me. Yep! I wet myself. Hence, when I got you home, I could not get out of the car and walk you to the door. My pants were wet. (Believe me, this is still painful to recall.) I was humiliated beyond words.

When I heard later that you Dad forbade you to see me again because of my demonstration of poor manners and disrespect, I was despondent. But it was too much for me to speak of. Even after the doctor diagnosed what he called "spastic colon", and remedied the temporary condition with some pills, I could not overcome my humiliation, and sorrow, to tell you how devastated I was at the loss of whatever our relationship may have held the promise of being (and have revisited that loss with remorse many times since.) I was truly in love with you. There! At long last, I have told you.

I have lived, for a long time, with the guiding life-navigating star of "if it holds the possibility of ever being an 'I wish I had' ... do not let the moment pass without doing or saying whatever holds that potential." If I had not let you know the truth about that miserable night ... it would forever remain an "I wish I had."

I truly hope that this strange and unusual note finds you basking in the fullest of this Christmas Season's joy and happiness. I remain, forever, your admiring Friend and Servant,

John-Michael

There ... now You, Dear Reader, know that I do (even in the most awkward and challenging of circumstance) honor my Spirit's claim on me. As bizarre and odd as this example may seem, (and I know that you cringed [with me] as you read it) I cannot deny Life's claim on me. Responsibility to the demand of the Gift of each moment is what drives me on. And I promise You that it is a joyfully satisfying and fulfilling path to follow.

Just listen ... then trust the result or response to the omniscient power of Life's unfailing Love. It NEVER blunders.

I love You.

Linger With Me ... For Just 4 Minutes

Now ... close your eyes ...

There!

(I knew that you needed that.)

[loving smile]