Magic has always been a fascination for me. To watch the skillful performance of a talented illusionist is a thing of wonder and amazement. I am so intrigued by the practice that, many years age, I involved myself in the art as a hobby. Learning the mechanisms that produced the “magical” effect was fun and presenting the “tricks” to others was an enjoyable experience. But the knowledge of the methods employed in producing the effect removed the “Magic” from the whole business. Gone was the wonder and amazement of being mystified by inexplicable feats. What replaced the wonder was a sense of appreciation for the “mechanics” of the presentation… the skills, the dexterity, the commitment of hours of disciplined practice that were required to bring about the desired “WOW!” from an observer. I was left with the same emotional effect as the one experienced when watching a motion picture without a musical background or “soundtrack.”
The music creates the same wonder in my soul that the mystery creates in the performance of the illusionist. In each instance, the “ungraspable” or intangible element leaves the spirit as if hanging in mid-air… supported by some unseen, undefinable, but very strong force that exhilarates. While I can certainly appreciate the story being presented in the soundless movie… (the artful portrayals of characters… the convincing scenery and staging… the “mechanics“) the movie loses some of its “Magic” without the music. And, mind you, there are distinctly different degrees of effect produced by various levels of musical applications.
We are all familiar with the effects created by the playing of a piano to support the emotional themes of the old ‘silent films.’ With this primary form of musical manipulation of our senses, we could ‘feel’ the message of the story more completely. From those rudimentary beginnings, we can now have every nerve ending and molecule of our being stimulated, vibrated, and dislodged to move us in whatever direction the movie-maker wants to take us. Musical soundtracks not only enhance and support the story being presented; they take on a separate and independent life of their own. So it has been in my personal romantic relationships.
In my first discoveries in the world of interpersonal exchange, I most often had my understanding of the true nature of the exchange’s character clouded by the bombastic “music” of youthful desires and expectations. If there was, indeed, any ‘music’ behind the moment, it could scarcely be heard over the din created by my own heart’s expression. Time and painful experience worked together to educate my “listening” skills. This is not to say, however, that I have accomplished some “advanced degree” in recognizing the “music” behind every encounter. Even at the ‘advanced’ age of fifty-eight years (a short while ago), I was swayed in my perceptions by the clouds of predisposition. I, met a very special Someone whose very being told such an overwhelming story that I became swept up in her presentation of herself and began to hear a symphony of transcendental proportions (and though that may sound grandiose to the extreme, those of you who have been caught in the rip-tide of romance know that I understate the inestimable.) Knowing myself to be the ridiculously romantic idiot that I am by my very nature, I repeatedly asked if she was “hearing” the same soundtrack that I was aware of. (I will grant you the fact that we were working with the challenge of a French/English language barrier.)
Yet, still, I was receiving repeatedly positive responses to my attempts to clarify the nature of our “music.” And there was, most certainly, a magical presence felt at each consideration of even her name. Such is the consequence of passion. But, alas, the language and distance barriers were overcome and clarity provided the awareness of reality. What was romance to me is an intense friendship to her. We have agreed to the joys of a satisfying “Soul-Friends” communion and I now see accurately the mechanisms at work in our relationship. That insight clears away the “magic” element; the “symphonic” soundtrack; the over-the-top choral accompaniment… and leaves us with a realistic and genuine treasure that is legitimately “us.”
It was a tremendous revelation to me when I learned that the vast majority of the world’s population does not share my innate yearning for romance. I now fully understand and appreciate the fact that a comfortable and conflict-free functioning of the “mechanics” of a harmonious relationship is all that most want. But I will never envy them their security of emotion. While I do respect the ‘sanity’ of their safe approach to life, I would never exchange (were it even possible), for any consideration, my own zest for the magic of the full orchestration of romance. This is Life’s gift to me and I am abundantly grateful for it. I can happily say that I have been fortunate enough to experience the mystical and magical effect of a symphonic accompaniment to a relationship. That gift will be revisited in the gallery of recollection for the rest of my days.
So, My Friend, I write to you with a two-fold purpose. First, to encourage you to develop the skill of recognizing the nature of the ‘movie’ in which you find yourself performing with each person with whom you share a moment. I entreat you to enhance those opportunities by discerning the kind of music accompanying each encounter. Know the pleasure of a simple ‘harmonica’ playing behind a casual meeting. Savor the ‘string quartet’ that enhances a friendship. March to the tempo of a ‘band’ giving a Sousa feel to the camaraderie of those unique relationships. Sway to the intimacy of ‘chamber music’ in chambers appropriate to the occasion. Permit yourself to be fully immersed in each encounter. Secondly, it is my desire to equip you with some new language… perceptions… tools with which to better take responsibility for, manage, and enjoy the full spectrum of your own life’s plethora of magical, musical, and potentially entertaining theater of relational possibilities.
IMAGES: Through the gracious courtesy of
Ian Britton, FreeFoto.com
First, my being “in love with all (of my) readers” is a matter of selective choice. I (just as you) have available to me the full range of possibilities for my response to the lives whose paths intersect mine. And I have made a conscious choice to make my “default setting” for my personal response to the world… LOVE. It really is that simple (as it must be for me to make it… ‘complex’ gives me a headache.)
But my choice remains to have my initial response to others set on LOVE. And the rewards for that choice more than outweigh the total weight of all of the accumulated emotional scar-tissue from all of the unhappy occasions (and there have been PLENTY!) of my past. And do not even begin to voice your “well, if you had ever experienced what happened to me” stuff. My “stuff” is as legitimate to my life as anyone else’s is to them. Stinko is Stinko in the nostrils of the individual doing the inhaling. (How’s that for a profundity?)
IMAGES through the gracious courtesy pf Jon Sullivan, PDPhoto.org
