Saturday, October 18, 2008

Alternative Investment Considerations

If you had purchased $1,000 worth of shares in Delta Airlines one year ago, you will have $49.00 today.

If you had purchased $1,000 worth of shares in AIG one year ago, you will have $33.00 today.

If you had purchased $1,000 worth of shares in Lehman Brothers one year ago, you will have $0.00 today.

But, if you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the aluminum cans for a recycling refund, you will have received $214.00.

Based on the above, the best current investment plan is to drink heavily & recycle. It is called the 401-Keg.

A recent study found that the average American walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found that Americans drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year. That means that, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon!

Makes you proud to be an American!

(With my "Thanks" to Heather for her generous sharing of these thoughts. [smile])


lime said...

shoot, i KNOW i drink way less alcohol than that so that makes me even more efficient!

i think i am gonna put my money in jars and bury it in the yard. my family has found and raided my change cup which had about $50 in quarters dim3es and nickels. so even my mattress ain't safe.

nitebyrd said...

There is a saying about God(s)wanting us to be happy which is why he/she/it/they invented beer!

Thanks John-Michael for bringing a sweet smile during this bitter time.

Annie said...

very clever!


John-Michael said...

Here! Let me offer THIS, to you Lime. [smile]

I just knew that you are a 'hybrid.' Nothing about you even hints as 'standard.' (And I do enjoy every unique feature of who you are.)

Love Ya ...

John-Michael said...

Nothing like sharing a laugh in the face of Ickiosity, My darling NiteByrd. (Especially between those of us who refuse to be defined by the stuff that the world would want to conform us with. [smile])

I do love you (doncha know) ...

John-Michael said...

I do find silliness o be a good refuge, Dear Annie. (And the voice of a sweet Friend is also a welcome balm. [smile])

Ever-grateful for you ...

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