It has taken a lot of living to begin to understand two precepts that govern my ability to relate to and appreciate life. First… no person is to be possessed. Second… no place is my destination. These two run contrary to all that the world would have me understand. What I have had presented to me is the concept that I should find “The One” who is to “be mine” for all of my life. And that I should make “a home” that is where I am to reside for all of my life. Both of these assumptions are in absolute contradiction to the natural dynamic of living. Neither of these beliefs give consideration to the realities of immaturity, growth, maturation, nor refined tastes (not to mention the infinite range of variables affecting the elements of life exterior to ourselves) that make for a changing Self.
Experience has taught me that each moment is temporary… and the elements of that moment are, likewise, temporary… and fleeting. Much effort is made and energy wasted in the attempt to cling to the vanishing vapor of life’s moments. Great amounts of pain and anguish is known in the lamenting of passed circumstances, material ‘stuff’, and relationships. The acceptance of every gift entrusted to us on our journey as something to be grateful for, in the context of that moment, is an art in living that is not spoken of. For, My Dear Friend, is not even the moment in which we are blessed with a gift, in and of itself? Should we not be saying, with each passing tick of our life’s clock, “Thank you Life, for the gift of this moment… with all of the circumstances and elements that it offers?” But we are encouraged… nay!… we are required (by the insistent pressures of all around us) to claim ownership of and declare exclusive rights to jobs, friends, homes, lovers, spouses, children, political affiliations, and on, and on. Yet… just one encounter with a debilitating disease brings us to the immediate recognition of the reality that… we neither own, nor control anything that we have so carefully inventoried and placed our label on. Even the next breath that we take… we do not take… it is GIVEN to us as a gift.
So, it is with a sense of urgency that I discipline myself to focus… really take measure of… every single minute detail of my life. Thereby giving myself the ability to humbly say “Thank You Life” for it all. And to each of you who are struggling with the frustrations, disappointments, pains, and anguish of seeking that permanent, perfect, absolute… ANYTHING… please, I implore you, step back… give thanks for (and let everyone involved know… by telling them… that you are thankful for) everyone and everything that is part of the moving, growing, evolving, and dynamic life that you are living. For then, My Sweet, exasperated, confused, and anxious Friend, you will be truly LIVING your life… as it is RIGHT NOW. And a succession of moments lived in this awareness all add up to Your Life well lived.
In the hope and with the abiding desire that these reflections will serve to benefit the very next step that you take, I remain (as always) Your Loving Friend and caring Servant.
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2 comments:
This is one of the hardest lessons to learn. And one that I despair of ever fully comprehending. Thank you for the reminder.
I sometimes remind myself of the old (a real fact) "monkey trap." The painfully simple concept is to place a banana in a small box that affords the monkey slots to see the banana and smell it... and a small hole through which to slide his hand in. But when he grasps the banana (or whatever the bait) his clenched fist is too big to withdraw. He will not release the fruit even though to hold onto it is certain capture. So he looses the possibility of many fruit in freedom, for the one that he insists on not letting go of. The same applies to holding onto old habits, jobs, circumstances, relationships that are past their season, etc. Which is why the "trap" works!
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